I love this photo by Rusty
March 18, 2010
My own experience of life is that time can cause me to forget my feelings. But time is not sufficient for me to change them. Underneath-- the original perception which caused all the feelings, has not changed.
What brings true healing is when I bring it all to my Higher Self, who gives me a totally different way to interpret everything which happened. Then my perception changes, and the new perception brings me peace.
Time, just by itself is like a scab which grows over where a thorn had gone in. What my Higher Self does is gently peel back the scab and remove the thorn.
Sweet and instant perfect healing takes place.
It goes beyond that even, because it is heaven to be perfectly understood. By the time it is over I could care less what I thought had been done to me. I am just lost in the joy of divine understanding.
I find it so interesting to be perfectly understood. And it helps me understand myself.
I realize now that before I had my Higher Self I did not understand one single thing about myself. LOL I was unfathomable to myself.
And sometimes it cracks me up what my Higher Self says. There is nothing funnier than to laugh at myself.
One long hot summer afternoon soon after we moved to Tucson, Bill was at art school, I was trapped in the house by the heat. I had no friends, I was not on email or computer. No one called on the phone. I didn’t have cable TV, there was nothing to watch. I was bored to tears.
So I would just lie on my bed and chit-chat with my Higher Self. I would remember things from my past which had upset me and bring them to her. And one afternoon I asked her about Tony and Muffin.
Tony had been a boyfriend I had when I was nineteen, I had a big crush on him, and he was my first lover. Then he met my new roommate Muffin and went somewhere with her and never came back.
I moved back home the next day and never saw either of them again.
Although two years later when I first began living with Alan in the East Village, he told me he had bumped into Muffin and Tony in the street and they are living in a loft in SoHo. So I guess they stayed a couple forever.
I said to my Higher Self “I will never forgive Tony for jilting me for Muffin.”
I was still mad about it all these years later even tho I had forgotten about it.
But my Higher Self had whole different take on it.
“You and Tony did favors for each other,” she said.
“What favor did Tony do for me?” I asked.
“He introduced you to sex,” she said.
“What favor did I do for Tony?”
“You introduced him to Muffin," she said.
And I laughed for twenty minutes. It tickled my funny bone so much. It changed forever how I saw it all. Now I saw it the way my Higher Self did.
That’s when I discovered how much fun it can be to bring things to my Higher Self to get her take on it.
It was so much fun to laugh at myself.
For sure it is the funniest thing anyone ever said to me and what makes it even funnier is everything my Higher Self said is true.
Is it possible the truth is by definition a riot? Or is it just that we humans are a riot as we plotz along in life from one scraped knee to another.
“Show me your booboo” our Higher Self says “and I will kiss it and make it better.”
And so we bring our scraped knee to her.
It doesn’t always lead to me laughing uproariously on my bed. But it does always lead to quiet happy peace.
LOL it cannot be denied our Higher Self is a trip!!!
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